When healing feels like mountain climbing

Acadia National Park, Maine, USA. 

No one EVER said that healing emotionally and intellectually after abuse was easy; certainly NOT me. I know that it feels like an uphill battle...it can be lonely and it can be scary. 

At times, maybe most of the time, our healing journey feels like climbing and even scaling a mountainside...we are always pushing ourselves to "go higher" with little to no understanding or expectation of what it will look like when we get to the top. 


I remember climbing hills and "being a mountain goat" among the rocky mountain sides near my home when I was young. I loved to hike and found a challenge in ever nook and crevice along the way. I was careful to make sure that my FOOTING was secure...this is a really important step (pardon the intentional pun) in our healing journeys as well.

There were times that I had to pause and rest along the way; it wasn't a sprint or a race. I PACED MYSELF.

The higher I climbed the better the view looked; I could SEE FARTHER when I was up higher. It also gave me greater motivation to continue.

As I looked BACK, I could see what I had left and I was NOT sorry for having traveled though it might have been treacherous at times.

I could feel that I HAD BECOME STRONGER already. I had climbed this high and experienced a "new perspective" on my world and I felt like I had really accomplished something.

When I reached the top; which it may feel like we never succeed in doing in our healing journeys, it is exhilarating. I know that I have had moments, experiences and feelings of great joy and pride in my own accomplishments along my healing path and that I could ENJOY THE TRIP more if I was not focused on the "end" result...in life, in my opinion, it is the journey that is what it is all about; not the mountain top.

Our life's journey is really all about "finding ourselves, healing from abuse and learning to dream again" and to accomplish each step in our own time and way...It will not be done in one day; it is a healing journey that sometimes feels like climbing a mountain...and that's okay. WE are worth it all!!!

I just don't FEEL like it...

Have you ever gotten to a point that you rhetorically ask yourself "What IS the point of it all?" You feel fed up, tired and any attempt to "make things better" has usually ended up with life being much harder, more painful. We may even get to the point that we just have to ask "What the...*add your own expletive*"?????

Sometimes we get so tired of fighting that we stop to reevaluate why we are fighting so hard and what we are fighting for in the first place. This is actually a great to do. And though we may be feeling that we are on the border of depression and emotional exhaustion. The question we can ask ourselves is "What do we do when we "just don't feel like it?" What would be best for us???



The first thing that I do in these times is to have a talk with myself. Yes, I talk to myself a bit. I am at least assured that someone who cares is listening...and I say "It's OK that I feel like crap right now, emotionally I feel exhausted, sad, helpless and even to the point of asking "what the *****?" about nearly everything in my life...just GO AHEAD and FEEL YUCKY...feel it really good. Experience the YUCK of life that most people avoid. Become friends with it to the point of asking "it"..."Well, what do WE feel like doing today?"...because as you know the answer to that question overall is "I just don't feel like it". 

It's almost humorous when we see it from this perspective but sometimes we just have to laugh when we feel like crying. Find the absurd in the confusion and make fun of it. Have a chuckle and say "YUCK" at the same time. It really is an unique experience. 

As with other posts and Facebook page posts, here at "Singing A New Song" we advocate and encourage everyone to face their pain. Don't deny it any longer. Make faces and laugh at it. You may find a creative way to release your feelings and produce something wonderful and even helpful to others that may feel as you do...as I have.

Please remember that YOU are WORTH all the yucky, icky, sad, disappointing, angry and heartbreaking emotions that can be felt. To feel is to live. Let's just try to "find ourselves, heal from abuse and learn to dream again" and FEEL BETTER while we are "Singing a New Song". Let's listen to our hearts and sing the song that we hear.

We are worth it!!! 

Nothing is impossible

It seems ludicrous doesn't it? Imagine a butterfly which weighs a fraction of an ounce (maybe not a gram of weight) trying to pull a pound (or half a kilogram) weighted rock. Ridiculous. Yet, I will propose that NOTHING is impossible. OH, I am not saying that the butterfly CAN pull the rock by a string. I bet that this would certainly BE impossible; BUT it is NOT impossible for the butterfly to free herself. Letting go of the weight that is tying her down. She doesn't HAVE TO pull the rock with her. Like abuse, if we can let go of the weight of abuse, then we can learn to fly again.


If our butterfly could grow muscles from the pulling of the rock, we could imagine that she will have become stronger and then if she were presented with a similar but less weighty object the next time, then perhaps, just perhaps...who knows what might happen. She just might be able to pull that rock along...or better yet, snap the string that binds her to the abuse...set herself free and "find herself", "heal from abuse" and "learn to dream again".



When we find ourselves in an abusive situation; we can VALIDATE ourselves and EVALUATE the situation and then ask ourselves "are we the butterfly who will be set free?" or will we continue to allow the rock to hold us down?
We have a choice...WE ARE WORTH IT!!!

“When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this - you haven't.” ― ---------- Thomas A. Edison

I love this; "when you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this- you haven't"...
leave it up to Thomas A. Edison to leave us with another wonderful truism. Of all people, he would have truly known this. He created THOUSANDS of wonderful, life-changing inventions and realized that UNTIL he succeeded; failure was just another attempt to show him how it was NOT to be done.