For the abusers who are OUT of my life...thank you!

It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.

King James Bible

This goes for an angry man as well...

Mental illness is insidious and "they do not know what they do"...forgive them...say NO to abuse and MOVE ON...

you are worth it!!! 

I thought I had experienced abuse in marriage; a Christian marriage, no less but what I experienced since 2009 has been FAR MORE than I ever wanted to know about mental illness and trying to have relationship with one who is suffering from a Personality Disorder.

I dedicate this blog entry to the WOMEN whom I have met who have been so vile, so abusive and claim that it is "because of their PTSD" that they have lashed out, threatened and violently gritted (and gnashed and grind their teeth as the Bible states) their teeth while tightly clenching fists in rage to intimidate instead of physically attacking...mentally assaulting their uncontrollable victims. 

Yes, there are women abusers. Women who, through their own abuse and pain and denial of mental illness, expect others to "do their bidding" or "pay the price"...

This was very uncomfortable for me but easier because I had witnessed first hand, a man being abused by this woman. I could detach and help him set healthy boundaries as we were threatened with our safety if "we were to have conspired" against her. 

Mental illness is real. We all deserve to be loved and respected and not controlled and intimidated. She used to have a "friend" (I kept her at arm's length intentionally and did not involve her with many others in my life because of what I understood at the time...for this I am very grateful) who would take her grocery shopping, go out for coffee, go to the latest Convenient store/Gas station plaza Grand Opening, transportation to doctor's visits and the library and occasional lunch. So with SO much to lose WHY does a person act this way???

It is hard to explain but very easy to remedy. NO ONE deserves to be spoken to disrespectfully...put down...threatened or controlled...a simple "I will not allow myself to have any contact with her" is all that is needed...say NOTHING...do NOTHING. 

Block them on Facebook...Delete or put as "do not receive" on your phone. Warn any other friends who might have any association of your "pulling away" from her and having NO CONTACT due to her abusive and dangerous behavior.

It is time to call abuse what it is. Whatever its source, whatever the gender, nationality or religion of the person...we have the right to DISSOCIATE with them..have NO CONTACT and go on to live our lives without the drama, abuse and control that a Narcissistic person needs.

We can enjoy our own company...we do not need the constant "Praise" that a narcissist demands. We do not need to "put others down" especially those who have helped and encouraged us...we have more sense than to "bite the hand that feeds us" while they may feel resentful that they "depend" so much upon us. Cut that dependence today...  

I am an abuse survivor advocate and mental health advocate and still run into persons who try to run my life...no more...

Wishing you healthy and happy relationships...any other kind, are not worth your time.