When to let go

Letting go. We have read about how we need to let go of the past to embrace our future.
Let's look more closely at what "letting go" really means.

• It is deciding (that it is time) to "say NO to abuse". It is taking a serious look at the relationship; seeing it has it has been and will  probably continue to be, abusive. 
• It means that we allow others to be as they are; we realize that we need to be true to ourselves rather than expect others to behave in ways that they may have promised. 
• It is holding onto your life and self while you feel that someone else is trying to hold onto you for their own selfish reasons and would rather hurt you than lose you. 

We need to LET GO of a relationship when we find that we are losing ourselves in it. It feels like we are slipping away and no one else cares.


We hurt but we are shown no compassion, sympathy...there is no caring, listening ear and we cry alone. Relationships, truly committed ones, will "stick it out" when WE are feeling that it is taking more from us than giving to us. That is just the nature of a loving relationship; growing together. But when we can't grow WITH the ones we love, they become UNWILLING to grow themselves, we usually end up growing apart. Emotionally detaching is what we need most at this point in any relationship. It is no longer healthy or "alive". 

Taking care of ourselves and "letting the chips fall where they may"  is a natural justice system. I believe that "LETTING GO" is part of the process of extricating ourselves from abuse as well as starting our path of healing. LIVE and LET LIVE as some say. We don't have to "go after revenge" for how we have been treated. WE NEED TO LET GO of the feeling that we need to DO something to be free...we sometimes just need to walk away, not look back and when they text and call and try to talk to us through friends, we need to NOT LISTEN. 

• We have LET GO of the unhealthy need for that relationship. 
• We have LET GO of wanting "get back" what was taken. 
• We have LET GO of the feelings that if we could just tell them how badly they hurt (and expect them to care for us) that the relationship could continue with NO promise of a healthy relationship.

• We have LET GO of expectations to be treated differently by a person who has abused us. Abusers don't change.
• We have LET GO of the fantasy that he will "change" and become loving.
• We have LET GO of the need to hold onto a DEAD relationship.
• We have LET GO when we reach out for OUR LIFE!!!

KNOWING WHEN to "let go" is much less important than knowing that YOU ARE WILLING to LET GO...when you are willing, the TIME to let go will reveal itself.

Are you hurting today? Are you holding onto a dream of a relationship but feeling that you are "slipping away?". Counseling is available for people who truly love each other and are willing to work together to HEAL from past wounds. But you do NOT have to wait to seek help for yourself because someone else is in denial or seems uncaring about what you are feeling. Please TAKE GOOD CARE of yourself.

 YOU deserve to be healed. 

YOU deserve to be happy. 

   YOU deserve to be "YOU"...

YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!