What do you see?

When I first created THIS blog in 2010, I thought of it as an exercise in writing and expression of my thoughts and feelings of living in an abusive (christian) marriage. Little did I understand at that point, that THIS blog would become a "megaphone" to voice out my understanding of how verbal abuse and mental illness can so deeply affect our lives. It has also become my opportunity to share my healing journey of  "finding me, healing from abuse and learning to dream again".

What I THOUGHT was the problem, was the ONLY thing that I could see. It was an epiphany for me to realize that I have MUCH MORE control over WHAT I SEE, HOW I perceive it, WHAT beliefs I hold and WHY I allow them to affect how I feel and respond to others. 

WHAT I SAW and believed, 

affected my life MORE 

than what was outwardly occurring.  

It is NOT enough to "think positive thoughts". I believe that in just "thinking positive", we can be lead deeply into denial and lose discovering the REAL causes of the symptoms that we are experiencing. It also leads to accepting a "truth" of ourselves, that is NOT based upon reality. I had begun to learn that changing a few thoughts to ones that were more "positive" did NOT sufficiently bandage the deep oozing psychic wounds that you and I experience, but only denied my pain and damage. I was effectively and negligently avoiding the deeper needs of my soul; bearing deep pain while smiling on the outside and looking like I didn't have a problem in the world.   

As "Singing a New Song" developed and then was translated into the Facebook page that it has been for the past year, I hold to the premise that "happy thoughts" won't heal us. They may not even make us feel good for a short while. Only KNOWING our thoughts, what we believe and WHY we FEEL as we do because of them can lead us to healing and greater happiness in life. 

So when you stop by this blog, and I am glad that you do, you will know NOT to expect some shallow rhetoric, some hot air or quick fixes. There are none. I truly believe that EVERYONE can change their lives right where they are this very moment and "find themselves, heal from abuse and learn to dream again" even if we have been abused, rejected, lied about and cast aside. We can learn to BE PATIENT and LOVING toward ourselves. We can learn to SEE what we really do not want to see in our lives. We can learn how we CAN feel good about ourselves and our lives again...

So when you hear (or read) "Singing a NEW Song", think of it as openly embracing and singing a truly happy and authentically joyful song instead of the dirge that you have been carrying around in your heart. We have something to sing about. We CAN "find ourselves, heal from abuse and learn to dream again"...it is NOT JUST a positive thought but a REALITY that you and I CAN experience.

I know that I am worth whatever it takes to "be free to be me" and I hope that you have come to believe that 
YOU ARE WORTH IT too!!!